So my life kinda fell apart…
Things have been hard here the last few weeks. Trauma recovery stuff bubbling up and causing me problems. Eating disorder stuff fucking up my life. Therapy not helping as much as I want it to. Feeling like a big fat useless waste of space.
And on top of that I’m sick. Sore throat, cough, major headache, the works. So I’ll be back to the doctor tomorrow. I don’t know when I’ll get back here. I feel like a total asshole cause there’s people waiting on things from me and I’ve not photographed some, and not even finished others. I need to get a grip here soon or everything’s going to fall apart entirely.
I have these bursts of productivity and hopefulness but they like to shatter on me unexpectedly a few hours or days later.
So my deepest and most sincere apologies go out to Newvagabond, Turpentinehoneybee, Sameoldsorceress, and any other wonderful people I’ve failed to follow through with in the last few weeks. You are incredible amazing folks and I am trash and I’m sorry you’ve been waiting on me so long. :/
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And totally destroys your chances for anyone trusting you as far as they can throw you. Narcissism and arrogance are not positive traits. They’re great big huge red flags for abusive people. >.>
Any late night conversation between me (Finn) and kaveryworldofwonders (Jake). :P
And then we switch places when certain situations come up. This is an endlessly spiraling situation of self loathing. Maybe we should fix that. XD
Mother, if I say “You don’t have to be rude” that doesn’t mean you respond with a threat. Don’t snap back at me that “We don’t have to do it at all.” And when I try to continue trying to talk to you anyways, and be nice by asking what time you want to come out for the sale you’re threatening me with, don’t snap at me and say that “YOU pick a time, and I’ll see if I can be there” Because I know damn well if I pick a time that’s too early for her liking, she’s just going to bitch at me how tired she is on Friday.
That is not how you proceed with a positive line of conversation. Which is also not how you proceed with a positive line of thought. I won’t let you destroy my happy. I am going to be fucking GLAD for the money that’s coming in. And even more glad now because I am reminded how much I desire to escape from your negativity. I have never been able to voice my concerns when I feel she’s being unfair to me. Whenever I’ve tried, I’ve gotten hit with anger and threats.
But with the money that is coming in, I will never have to deal with her hatred again. I will be free to go and do as I wish with no need to deal with her at all if she’s being horrid. I can travel, or have sales, or make things, or hang out with friends around the world. I can do anything I damn well please and she will have no input whatsoever. That is going to be wonderful. The freedom of never having to put up with her again is something I truly look forward to.
No, it’s alright. It’s not like I needed to rest at all. Not like this makes 3-4 nights now with only getting 2-3hrs of sleep. Please do blast the TV so loud I can hear it from the basement, drag chairs across the kitchen floor above my head, and talk over the TV so I can make out the conversations you’re having in the living room.
I so wish I had brought earplugs. Just didn’t realize I would need them. It wasn’t nearly this bad the last time I was here, and there were more people. But put together one nearly deaf lady a woman who hates me for my faith, and my mother? Yeah, one doesn’t notice how horribly loud everything is, and the other two don’t give a shit about my life. So this is super fun. I hope mummy dearest decides we go home late tonight. Then I might have a chance at sleeping. -___-
reblog and make a wish!
this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)
OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.
THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.
The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.
AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.
THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.
I SAW THIS ON MY DASH THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT “ITS WORTH A TRY” SO I WISHED I COULD GET A 3DS
LITERALLY LIKE 4 DAYS LATER MY DAD SENT ME A PICTURE OF THE 3DS XL HE BOUGHT FOR ME WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL
IM STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS
holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS.
I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT
SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP
WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????
ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE
OKAY I SWEAR TO GOD THIS THING WORKS YOU HAVE TO PATIENT BC I WISHED THAT I COULD MOVE AWAY FROM MY SHITTY TOWN TO A WARM PLACE AND GUESS WHAT THIS JULY IM MOVING TO NORTH CAROLINA OKAY GUYS IM NOT MAKING THIS UP I AM SO CONFUSED ACTUALLY THIS IS GREAT BYE
LEMME TELL U SOMETHING THIS SHIT WORKS
Unfuck tomorrow morning
- Wash the dishes in your sink
- Get your outfit for tomorrow together, including accessories
- Set up coffee/tea/breakfast
- Make your lunch
- Put your keys somewhere obvious
- Wash your face and brush your teeth
- Charge your electronics
- Pour a little cleaner in the toilet bowl (if you don’t have pets or children or sleepwalking adults)
- Set your alarm
- Go to bed at a reasonable hour
Sleep well my lovelies! I’ll hopefully get the queue back up and running sometime tomorrow. Going upstate to help take care of family. She fractured another two vertebrae, so now the overly religious family member needs more help than before. Which means in 15hrs my pets are being moved to mum’s house where her neighbor can take care of them for the next few days.
Brigghan comes with me to avoid another doggy meltdown. When I went to the wedding, I came home to a dog having a nervous breakdown. Like, freaking out whining, crying, pawing the crap outta me, and barely letting me move cause she kept climbing on me. She’s still following me around everywhere and getting underfoot. She won’t even let me head to the restroom without having a freakout outside the door. Some serious separation anxiety right there. O_O
Anyways, I’ll be out of town but I’m hoping to have enough spare time to get the queue filled. I wonder if I’ll ever get through that drafts folder, or if I’ll kick the bucket and still have posts saved from like five years ago. Haha
I’ve been thinking about Arthurian legend a lot lately. For those who aren’t aware, I do very firmly believe there is truth in those stories. Just accept that and please don’t fight me on it.
THIS IS IMPORTANT
Many people are so scared to want this. Just know that no matter what you look like, no matter how much or how little you weigh, no matter how able bodied or neuro typical you may or may not be, or even HOW YOU IDENTIFY, you are totally fine wanting to feel pretty and cute.
As a trans* person, I have seen so much hate towards trans guys and non binaries who wanna be pretty and cute sometimes. YOUR IDENTITY IS NOT A FACTOR HERE! If you wanna look pretty and cute, get your lil tushy out there and buy something that makes you FEEL pretty and cute. Cause anyone, regardless of any factors of any sort, can be pretty and cute. Don’t let anyone tell you any different.